blog fog

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Every day, there are about two hundred moments that I wish to blog about. Something the kids said or did, a conversation that I had with my husband or a friend, or simply some new thought or idea that stirs around in brain . . . just itching to be heard, read, or spewed out, if only for the purpose of never having to be thought about again.

Generally, I’m a quiet person, but over the last few years have come to realize that I have to express my heart, in spoken, written, or even typed words. I love to watch my world move around me, and comment on what I am seeing or experiencing. When I communicate these observations, I am healed, and my eyes are often opened to what God wants me to know about Him and His purpose.

The struggle? If I were to stop to write at the moment I have a thought or a story I want to share with the blog world, what does that communicate to my children? "Hold on sweetheart, that thing you just did was so cute . . . I must now spend the next half-hour to forty-five minutes documenting it. Oh, and can you make that face again? Cause I need to take a picture of that adorable thing you did for my latest post."

I know this is a modern day struggle, "Whoa is me . . . I have no time to blog!", but maybe this struggle is simply about not being able to find the time to capture my thoughts, and reflect on why it is that am lying on the floor, letting graham-cracker encrusted, snotty-nosed munchkins, kiss me all over my face and climb on me like a jungle gym. I am getting the feeling, from more and more moms who have waded through the murky, rapid moving waters of raising young children, that this time is the most precious time I will ever have with my kids, and possibly the most precious time I will experience as a human.

I believe this is true. And my understanding of this reality is compelling me to figure out how to allow myself the opportunity to laugh, breathe, cry, scream, sigh, and smile, alone with my thoughts, and fully present with God.

(I would love your thoughts, or the "What I Did’s" of your past. I would also love to know if you share in this struggle with me . . . please 😉 .)

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3 responses »

  1. Not quite sure if this is an apology, a complaint, a revelation, all of the above, none of the above, or a thinking aloud of an internalized struggle between “guilt” felt over not producing that which is expected of you from others, and joy over recognizing that which is truly fulfilling, (and BTW very fleeting) vis a vis motherhood. True we are all products of our upbringing and environment, and it isn’t quite fair to urge you to recall that mothers of preceeding generations had no ‘blogs’, per se; hand written, and largely private journals and/or diaries perhaps; long convoluted letters to dearest confidants on occasion; frequent phone conversations; or whatever means available to them which acted as the blog’s precursor. The thread connecting all ot these, and the one that rings truest is that all of us need to express, and vent, and ponder, and analyze, and ultimately, share…this is what seperates us from those creatures of God without intellectual capacity, and to do so is a necessity, not because others demand or expect it of us, but because we become richer, and more fulfilled human beings because of it. So, as much as we enjoy your deft contributions to, and maintenance of “…to be continued”, no matter what you do with your blog, it will be “all good”, Erington, because, simply stated, YOU are “all good”.

  2. i so understand, erin … back when my girls were small, though, we didn’t have computers, much less the blog-world, so the outlet for me was a spiral bound journal, or the periodic letters i wrote to the girls and tucked into their baby books for them to read when they got much older… maybe jot a word or two on a notepad at the time something especially memorable is going on to jog your brain later, and then after they’ve gone to bed in the evening take a half hour or so to expand your thoughts then?

  3. I truely struggle with having the time to do the extra. When Jack was littler, I so wanted to spend every moment with him and experience everything with him. I still want to do that and now that he is in school, it seems there are more things that I am missing. Treasure the time you are blessed to have with your children Erin. My time with Jack is sooooo limited because I have to work. I long for and wish so much that I could to what you are doing. I know that God has control of things and I know that I am blessed to have my boy and he is blessed to have me. I just pray every day that he grows up understanding how much God loves him and how much his mommy loves him…Blessings Erin.

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