just so

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I love my job. With all its quirks and challenges, I am still so thankful that I get to be home with my kids. I’m not always that positive about my job title, and for a time, I struggled quite a lot with not being able to bring home a paycheck and get the accolades of a “real” job. But those moments are becoming fewer and farther between. And as we are preparing to send Abby to preschool for a couple days a week in the Fall, I am seeing this precious PRECIOUS time start to dwindle. So, for the next few years, I will (I WILL!) savor the “at home” time I have with the kids.

My house will NEVER look “just so” during this time. And as much as I battle with this reality, I will never look “just so” in this period. In fact, the more I scramble to make sure all things are “just so” in my at-home mommy reality, the less time I am really “at home” and more I am stowed away in my own head…organizing the empty boxes of perfectionism.

So, my prayer for today, is that I can truly celebrate this period and give less and less attention to “just so”. Understanding that religiously throwing on my uniform (hoodie, jeans, t-shirt, flip-flops, sunglasses, and a ponytail) doesn’t necessarily mean I’m lazy. And really believing that the stains on my carpet are a beautiful symbol of what I want my home to be…a place where all people are welcome, dirty feet and all.

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3 responses »

  1. Erin, this post reminds me of one that I read on Simple Mom. Similarly, (although not exactly), I always worry that my home is too small, too cluttered, not “designer” enough, whatever… I have to remind myself daily to be “courageous,” and know that those who love me, love my house and whatever state it’s in… Thought you might enjoy reading the post.

    http://networkedblogs.com/hqokA

    Chris (Darby’s friend đŸ™‚

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